'One of the most remarkable additions to the literature of illness in our time.' --- The Times
'A luminous biographical memoir and an enthralling testament of love.' --- The Independent
'A moving
Insight into the redemption of a great man.' --- The Observer
Owner Reviews, Ratings, Comments and Criticism
Sheila Hale's in depth analysis of the emotional and physical toll that surrounded her husband John's stroke will enlighten and lift the spirits of those who take care of a loved one suffering from a stroke. The topic of aphasia has not been well known on a physiological basis; however, the emotional consequences have been pushed out of thought. This 247-page book does a wonderful job of connecting the physiological and emotional aspects of handling a loved one suffering from stroke-induced aphasia. Thus, the amount of passion felt by Sheila does not outweigh the amount of information she provides about stroke and aphasia victims. Overall, the book is education for the mind and inspiration for the spirit.
Although the book starts out as a tribute to John's life, it is very uneventful. John Hale was a gentleman and scholar before the "accident." He was greatly interested in natural history at a young age and volunteered for a Royal Air Force mission to study the mating activities of falcons in Whales. In addition, he focused his effort in studying Renaissance art by writing books, giving lectures, and charming the world with his talks on radio and TV. After teaching history at London University and becoming a chair of the Trustees of the National Gallery, he was knighted in 1984. Furthermore, he retired from teaching to focus on writing. He wrote his masterpiece, The Civilization of Europe in the Renaissance, in 1992 at the age of 69 proving that he was still interested in scholarly pursuits. Unfortunately, a month after publishing his masterpiece, John was found on the floor of his study after suffering a stroke.
If the reader is still reading, the main story starts about 40 pages into the book and starts to become more interesting. At this point, Sheila, John's wife, begins to recount the events following the stroke and her husband's progress through post-stroke life in a day-by-day diary. The stroke affected John's life greatly, but it seemed to affect Sheila's life equally, if not more because of the added burden of taking care of him. The whole book is not in diary form, but most of it is since she is writing about something dear to her life. The parts that are not in diary form are recollections of days she could not access her diary because she was away with John at a clinic, and these recollections are in paragraph form.
After summarizing John's life and achievements, Sheila goes on to describe the day of the stroke. Her comment stating that "it's strange how you remember such things about times of disaster" explains the crushing blow that John's stroke delivered to both of them. Although John was affected physically, Sheila was deeply affected emotionally immediately as well as in the long run. The thought of losing John was her motivation for rushing him to the hospital in an ambulance that showed up forty-five minutes after she called. Unfortunately, the damage done to John's brain was severe and caused him to be paralyzed on his right side caused by the stroke attacking his left hemisphere. The first part of John's rehabilitation included re-learning how to move and walk. At this point in the story, Sheila has learned to cope with her emotions and John has learned that he does not always have to be strong around his wife. Thus, their relationship strengthens and Sheila focuses her energy into helping her husband lead as normal a life as possible. Therefore, she does her research and tries to find professionals who can help her husband regain mobility and control with his right leg and arm. Unfortunately, no one can escape the problems with the healthcare profession. The hospital in which John was being treated was probably the worst hospital in England because he was not allowed to have physical therapy because the head of the hospital did not believe it would help. Since the hospital staff gave up on stroke victims like John, Sheila knew that she had to make a stance. So, she fought the hospital laws and transferred her husband to another doctor who was dedicated in helping her husband. She used her journalist skills to research and find any doctor who may be able to help and this dedication saved her husband from incurring any permanent damage. Thus, after much rehabilitation and physical therapy, John was able to walk short distances and perform certain tasks that were impossible months ago.
The next challenge was one that would last John the rest of his life. John was diagnosed with a speech disorder in which he could not say or write anything understandable. This was the biggest challenge for Sheila because it posed as a roadblock in his recovery as well as the recovery of their relationship. Therefore, it was always difficult for Sheila to understand what John wanted and what he was trying to tell her. However, her determination to get her husband back was stronger than her will to surrender and put him in a home. Therefore, she consulted multiple speech doctors who all tested John and found his case to be very interesting. As it turned out, he was able to identify missing words in a sentence, but he could not identify the object of the sentence. For example, when asked to fill in this sentence: When I sleep I rest my head on a ___, he would correctly put "pillow" in the blank. However, when asked, "What do you put on the pillow" he always identified the word "rest." He was unable to understand what he was supposed to do when asked that sort of question. This caused many doctors to come and go without a solid diagnosis until Sheila found an aphasia specialist.
John was diagnosed with aphasia and immediately started treatment. Although his writing improved and became more fluid, his speech was still very limited. He could only make sounds and say "fine," "bye," and "wall." This made it increasingly difficult to communicate since it discouraged John to speak or even write to Sheila, but Sheila was strong and kept supporting him throughout this difficult time. John was kept at a speech clinic for his therapy, but after a while he was released because he had reached a "plateau." Oddly enough, Sheila felt odd having John living with her back at home, and it was these small changes that created problems for them both. John felt happy to finally be back home with his wife, but Sheila felt strange now that she had to take care of him for the rest of his life. However, Sheila made sure to make John as comfortable as possible. This included having physical therapists come to their house for John's exercises so that his muscles do not tighten up and cause pain. Finally, seven years after the stroke, John began writing again. He wrote to friends and family and practiced his writing in his study. He was improving slowly, but improving nonetheless, until the day he died.
Sheila's dedication to her husband allowed her to help him return to the path of living life at his best even when he "was thinking of suicide." Although she never showed it, she was suffering as much as he was by seeing him everyday like a helpless baby. John eventually became strong enough to take care of himself, but Sheila never stopped trying to regain that lost communication between them. Their countless visits to speech doctors shows the spark that is still between them. In addition to the spark, it shows that Sheila is focused on learning everything about John's condition. For example, the book has a diagram of the brain with parts labeled. She also has MRI pictures of the brain after a stroke. The science mixed with emotions help depict her dilemma as a wife as well as a journalist. Furthermore, the mixing also causes the reader to stay involved with John's recovery. This book should be read as a history book because it covers stories that serve as lessons in life as well as science. Overall, the book is very educational as well as inspiring. It may be a slow read for some, but it is definitely worthy of recognition because of the perfect balance of emotion and knowledge that cover the pages of this book.
